Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
