I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
