Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
When are your genitals available?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize