so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
