I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize