Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
