what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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