i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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