$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
