if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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