If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize