Plan B is the new Plan A
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
