After last night, I could never be a politician.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
