If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
