oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
