Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
