as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
