i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
