they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
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