I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
