Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
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