i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
