I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize