I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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