so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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