we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
