we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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