the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
