margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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