Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
