I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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