why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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