I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
