dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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