Sponge bath it is.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
