hotel room ftw
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
