Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
This is my gift to your gina
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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