you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I am one with the molecules
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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