No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
