youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
bring money and cleavage
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
