Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize