The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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