Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
