I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
