Need sex. Gaining weight.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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