i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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