marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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