i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
