i just google imaged poop.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
did i just pee glitter
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
