4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
