gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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