hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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